Dear T.S. Eliot,

You were right. April is the cruelest month.

-Lindsay

Missin' You Like Candy

Emma: she's the type of celebrity i would totally want to party in a dive bar with

Lindsay: um YEA

Lindsay: I would totally hang out with Mandy Moore

Lindsay: …and I like to think that Mandy Moore would like to hang out with us as well.

Emma: yes

Emma: she would give us clothing advice

Emma: and lip gloss

Lindsay: and then we'd get drunk and sing Journey.

Emma: we would buy her one more jaeger bomb

Emma: it would be a party

Lindsay: yes.

Lindsay: that's it.

Lindsay: my new mission in life: become friends with Mandy Moore

Emma: yessssssss.

Emma: goal for summer 2008: stalk out Mandy Moore in a subtle way. Befriend. Party.

An Observation

There are some foods in this world that will turn an intelligent adult male into a 12-year old boy in a matter of seconds. As I witnessed last night, tacos are one such food. Foregoing utensils, Boyfriend scarfed his way through about 5 tacos, only coming up for air once he realized we were out of meat filling.

At which point he promptly picked up and ate whatever filling had fallen out of my tacos... with his hands.

I don't care what anyone says, boys are super gross.

Wedding Bells

Last summer I had the honor of planning a bridal shower and bachelorette party for my dear friend Kristina... and, while I love Kristina and I think she had a great time at those events I do not love the stress that comes along with the planning.

That's why I was so happy when the last toast was given at her wedding. It was over - the planning and the bargaining and budgeting. She was a starry eyed newlywed and I was her very in need of a vacation Maid of Honor.

This summer, I again have the honor of planning a bridal shower and bachelor/bachelorette party --this time, for my first roommate Tess. I can't help but worry that I won't bring as much joy and personality to her shower as I did to Kristina's because I know what happened when I approached the event that way. Chaos ensued.

I've already started approaching this shower differently. I just had a kick-off conference call with the other two women involved and have, since then, created a spreadsheet of things that need to be done and due dates.

You know what I've done? Turned being a Maid-of-Honor into a career.

*Loves It*

Reading

Day 25

Anne: Hi, Period. I’m expecting you sometime in the next couple of days. Shall I look for you around lunchtime like always? …Hello?

Day 28

Anne: Hello? I know you are there - the cramp phone keeps calling me.

Day 32

Anne: Ok, now you owe me eight dollars for the pregnancy test you know damn well I didn’t have to take this morning.

Day 35

Period: Here I am! Here I am!

Anne: You realize I’m in the middle of dinner.

Period: Yeah. And when you get up, you’re gonna realize I actually got here right before you served the salad.

A Conversation

Gina: hey dude, want to do me a quick favor?

Lindsay: sure?

Gina: measure from your elbow to your wrist

Lindsay: ....its a size 9 shoe... but thats the only measurement i can give you. i dont have a ruler

Gina: i finally picked up knitting again and i'm working on your glove things

Lindsay: like I said, its a size 9 shoe... or a closed umbrella

Lindsay: or its a fork and 1/4 or a checkbook and 1/3, that's a standard size right?

Gina: i think so... is the checkbook in a case? Or just the actual checks?

Lindsay: case

Waking Nightmare.

It was like going from a horrible nightmare into the best dream ever. And then I woke up this morning and was back in the nightmare.

Something has got to give... I'm just not sure what.

To better prepare myself for the impending vacation (6 days to go!) to Jamaica, I have done several things that I once swore off completely. These things include, but are not exclusive to, the following:

• Tanning. That's right, kids, I, Casper the friendly Marketing Manager, have started tanning. This is solely for the purpose of creating a base tan --aka a protective layer of melanin-- before I get to the resort and the sun has a field day with my fish-belly white skin.


• Buying/wearing shorts outside of the bedroom. On Saturday I went to Pacific Sunwear with a mission. Find shorts that are none of the following: short-shorts, bermuda shorts, capris, or denim. I found these little plaid ones by Roxy. This leads me to my next bullet:


• Wearing plaid. I know. I know. I've made fun of Tom and his plaid for about 4 years now and what am I going and doing but sticking that same pattern right on my bum. That said, I think we can all agree that my plaid is different from Tom's plaid. His is usually flannel and that's just not right (sorry, Tom! I still like that photo hoodie you're so fond of?).
  


• "Dieting". Before everyone goes all Jewish Grandmother on me and starts clucking about how I need to eat more, I'm already skin and bones, I'm not drinking only water and eating a cube of cheese every now and then to prevent myself from passing out. I'm just not eating an entire pizza (anymore - I swear last night was it!).


• Doing homework well before the due date. Yep, that's right. I have a few papers due right after spring break and, instead of waiting until I get back on Sunday to research and write two 20-pagers I have actually started the research and *gasp* even the writing.


• Packing before the last minute. Traditionally, I will wait until 10:00pm the night before a flight to even remember to pack. At that point I will usually throw a pair of panties (that one is for you, Fel) in the empty suitcase and then decide to go out, grab a drink, write the next great American novel, and learn the tuba. When 3:00am rolls around and I'm exhausted from the wine and accomplishment I will complete packing, inevitably forgetting something crucial - like pants. This won't happen for this trip. I'm so stoked on life for this vacation I'm already packed. 6 days in advance.
  

Be Jealous

After a 5 year hiatus from all things relaxing, I am getting on one of these for three hours:

To take me here for a week:

Actual image of the actual hotel that we are actually staying at.

In that week I will be doing nothing but drinking these:

Mimi Vice (aka half pina colada and half strawberry daquiri) the best frozen drink ever

While lying down for hours on this: